- You like turnover.
You know that rapid turnover means a constant influx of fresh energy (and lower wage workers), so you don’t mind the training, recruitment and lost opportunity costs.
- You have all the highly qualified job candidates you need.
You’re already considered an employer of choice. Every time you post a job, several ideal workers apply.
- Your labor costs are miniscule.
Labor costs mean nothing at your organization. You have all the staff you could use and plenty of money to pay for them. Efficiency and scalability are non-issues.
- You have no incentive to be green.
Cap and trade is never going to apply to you anyway, so all this green workplace business is irrelevant. Telecommuting and satellite offices are for Google and other granola crunching, flip-flop wearing beatniks.
- We’d have to pry that time clock out of your cold, dead hands.
You’re absolutely convinced that the best way to measure performance is to clock how much time people spend at their desks. It doesn’t matter how much time people spend working at home at night, you expect butts in chairs from 8 to 5. End. of. story.
- Your office looks like an episode of Mad Men.
You hire single women who remain dedicated employees until they get married and become mothers, and then they happily usher themselves out the door forever. And your office fathers never coach tee-ball or lead scout meetings.
- You wear pedometers and have apples in the break room—your wellness program is complete.
Employees are eating well and sleeping well and taking time to exercise. They don’t consider work to be stressful at all.
- New ideas are verboten.
Your office mantra is a variation on the following: That’s the way we’ve always done it. It was good enough for us, it should be good enough for them. Change is overrated.